There's nothing here to be proud of

I haven't been updating, no. All that's been happening lately is that my health has crashed even worse than usual. It's not depression this time, although I am starting to get awful melancholy.

I have been dizzy constantly for a week, as opposed to the intermittent spells I was suffering. Sleep and medication do nothing for it. I went to an ENT dude, he found no ENT reason for what was going on. But he did poke my neck and it HUUURT.

Ah yes, my neck: it hates going to the right especially, but generally it would rather it stays still. Every turn of the head brings dizziness. Bending down to pick stuff up is horrendous. I have electric tingles up and down my neck and spine (I likened this feeling to someone playing me like a xylophone). My arms tingle. My hands sometimes do. I feel nauseous when I do anything strenuous - oh right, but strenuous at the moment means something like getting dressed. I stupidly tried to go into town on Saturday, and almost threw up and fell over in the supermarket. I am confused and slow and cranky. I just want to sleep constantly and I never feel awake anyway. And the doctor wants to put me on diazepam! Christ.

So obviously I'm off work again. I have x-rays tomorrow and the fucking neurologist won't answer his phone but when he does my doctor is trying to rush me down there.

I'm scared, my job is at risk, I can't get off the sofa, there's something wrong with my brain or my neck or my back or all three, to say I am upset and terrified and distressed would be an understatement.

Nothing like breaking a silence with a load of depressing stuff.

Posted via LiveJournal.app.